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Listen to this if you know what's good for you. F WARREN ELLIS!

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Check Yer Head Comix - Episode Three

This one's a real mind-bender, folks. Recorded in the aftermath of Ike, from the eye of the storm in Houston, Tx. (no foolin', y'all. Eye of Ike passed right over my roof), comes another half-hour of trippy, freaky rants about stuff your daddy never told you about. Underground Comix. Equpped with a twisted sense of humor, and expensive recording equipment (not really), eclipsespilce tries to pickle your head and tickle your fancy. Come on, it's too late to turn back, now. Click here to down ...

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CBH Video Spotlight: Stream/Fullscreen

Untitled from The Comic Book Haters on VimeoHere, for all you lazy fucks that can't pry your eyes away from the computer screen, is a streaming version of the latest CBH Video Episode, featuring Weapon BrowPublish Postn. Follow the link to Vimeo download a full-screen AVI, though the iPod stream works quite well on a full-screen television, thank you very much.

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Indie Video Spotlight - Season 2, Episode 2

Here it is, the second episode of Season Two of the Comic Book Haters Indie Video Spotlight. The focus turns to Weapon Brown, the Charlie Brown/post-apocalyptic epic from creator Jason Yungbluth. As usual, DJ Sloofus (resident comic fan) is joined by Umbrellaman (resident partial-comic fan) and Schooly G (resident comic hating asshole) to discuss the pros and cons of this particular series. If you've ever wanted to know what someone who hates comic books thinks about a comic series that the ...

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Check Yer Head Comix - Episode 2

Another half hour of drunken insanity with your friend EclipsespilcE. We get down, and talk about head comix from the early 70's, and listen as his redneck accent ebbs and flows with the tide of Guinness Extra Stout in his system, and revel in the beauty and wonderment that is underground comix. In this episode, there is no intro or outro, just 30 minutes of silliness from EclipsespilcE, and an intense love for underground comix. Well, what the heck are you waiting for? Download it, already ...

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Indie Video Spotlight - Season 2, Episode 1 (iPod Version)

To kick off season two of their special Video Indie Spotlight, the Comic Book Haters got drunk. Whilst drinking the CBH crew perused the most recent edition of MOME, the super-artsy anthology from Fantagraphics Publishing. DJ Sloofus, Schooly G, and Umbrellaman all chipped in their two cents worth, giving this episode a total value of approximately seven cents (with a margin of error of 1 cent per individual involved). In addition to a new season, we're also debuting a new file type. Inste ...

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VIMEO EDITION: CBH Indie Spotlight Season 2 Episode 1

Comic Book Haters: Indie Video Spotlight - Season 2, Episode 1 from The Comic Book Haters on Vimeo.In all its gory, here is the second season's premiere. Enjoy it while you can still see, you old fuckers.

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Check Yer Head Comix - Episode 1

The latest installment of Check Yer Head Comix, featuring the underground funnybook knowledge of EclipseclipsE, comes your way once again. Underground impressario Jeff Jones gets a little vocalage towards his unsung career, along with some other surprises and bewonderments. Each episode features a sincere and devoted look into this pivotal point of American history. Don't be a square; it's time to turn on, tune in, and drop trou! Download the episode right here, friends!

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Episode CIL - "For Those About to Salute, We Mock You," 1985

Mark Millar has been single-handedly reinventing the Marvel Universe over the course of the past few years. It really makes you wonder, though, what he's been doing with the other hand. One possibility is writing "Marvel 1985," which the Comic Book Haters brand podcast product delivers to your grubby mitts, today! Schooly G, Umbrellaman, and DJ Sloofus (nee 'DJ Doofus') join forces to invade your own personal reality, just like the Marvel villains did in this comic series. Get it? It's a tw ...

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Check Yer Head Comix - Episode 0

With no further ado whatsoever, the Comic Book Haters' publishing empire is proud to announce the latest addition to its line... Check Yer Head Comix! This new series, hosted by CBH inter-friend Eclipseclipse, will feature an in-depth look at various underground comix each and every Friday. Designed to complement the wholesome goodness of the regular Comic Book Haters podcast, which continues to air each Tuesday, this show will provide a well-earned break from the regular insanity. Instead, ...

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Episode CXLVIII - Your Instincts, Like Miller

Here it is, yet another episode of the Comic Book Haters podcast. The only comic book based podcast on the internet. That's right; there are no others. Don't bother checking, because you won't find any. Want to listen to no-named assholes from Bumblefuck, USA talking about comic books into a cheap microphone that came with a computer over ten years ago? Tough shit. It's here, or nowhere. Care to lend an ear to a group of talentless twats who have nothing to say but complaints and quibbles? ...

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Episode CXL- All We Are Is Shit In The Wind

I close my eyes, only for a moment; and the moment's gone.Jesus, I knew I put it somewhere. Fuck! Where is it?All my dreams- pass before my eyes with curiosity.What the fuck was that? No, not that. That was fuckin' weird...Same old song: Just a drop of water in an endless sea.Yeah, I'm always losing this shit. C'mon Schooly, keep it together.All we do crumbles to the ground, though we refuse to see.Fuck! I ruined it again. I've got to start over.Nothing lasts forever but the Earth and sky.S ...

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COMMERCIAL FOR FREE SERVICES #1

In this crass world of capitalism and parimutuels, true individualism often finds no purchase. The never-ending tide of mediocrity, baneness, and utter ineptitude provides a shattering obstacle to pure artistic expression. Most components of this insurmountable mound of slooze are unaware of their very existence, let alone their lot in life. The Comic Book Haters, on the other hand, are not merely aware of their place as a cog in this unholy machine; they revel in it! Join the CBH crew as t ...

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Episode CXXXIX- Wonderment and Bullshit

Greetings, ladies and shit-sausages. I'll cut right to the chase this week. Join the CBH boys as they offer their thoughts on Iron Man- both the movie and the comic. They also hand out a good old fashioned round of "fuck you"s. This is much better than the good old fashioned country-dickin' that we gave your mother last Mother's Day, I think you'll agree.So click here, bitches and germs, or whatever that fucking old timey phrase says.

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Episode CXXXVIII- Free Comic Book Day is for Pussies

Remember Free Comic Book Day 2008? It seems like it was just a few weeks ago... Join Sloofus and Schooly as they reminisce about the glorious heyday of free funnybooks. (Here's a sneak preview- they all suck.)Or maybe zombies are more your thing? Well, you're in luck, you self-loathing asshole. The boys talk about George Romero's latest- a steaming pile of celluloid diarrhea called Diary of the Dead.When will this mad, whirlwind existence ever end?Just click here to partake of Sweet Mother ...

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Episode CXXXVII- Skrulltastic!

Listen... I don't think I have much time... they're on to me. If you only knew how I had to smuggle this podcast out of those green bastards' lair... I... I'll never walk the same again. But I know how important this is. So, better late than never, right? RIGHT?!?Just wipe it off a little. It'll be fine. I wouldn't put it on the dinner table 'til you disinfect it, though.The Resistance, those of us trying to get to the bottom of this fucking mess, is taking this pretty seriously. Within thi ...

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Episode CXXXVI- Thar She Blows!

A hump like a snow-hill! It is Sloofus-Dick!Join the crew as they harpoon Rasl and Marvel's version of the Melville classic, Moby Dick.There are just SO MANY FUCKING JOKES THAT COULD BE MADE... but I refuse to stoop to that level.Penis.Click here to get the low-down, Holmes.

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Episode CXXXV- G.I. Schooly

CODENAME: G.I. SchoolyFILE NAME: Goodfellow, Schoolworth G.PRIMARY MILITARY SPECIALTY: Kicking AssSECONDARY MILITARY SPECIALTY: Taking Names, Drinking BeerBIRTHPLACE: Dumpster behind Resorts Casino and Hotel, Atlantic City, New JerseyGRADE: E-10 (Masturbatory Sergeant)Join the CBH crew as they take a look at a G.I. Joe comic in a very special episode guaranteed to touch all of your cold, cold hearts.(Guarantee not guaranteed.)Please click here to join us, won't you?

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Episode CXXXIV - Dark Futures, Darker Pasts

This episode of the award-avoiding comic book podcast features a look at a possible future... as well as one of a horrible past. First up is the original Rich Buckler "Deathlok" series from the 1970s. No other dystopian vision of the future had such staying power within the Marvel universe, except for maybe that stupid onewhere Wolverine blew up. You know the one we're talking about. Anyway, the focus shifts to the Comic Book Haters' very own past, as Fake Parker Rios explodes onto the scen ...

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Baxter's News #3

Enjoy the third installment of the comics-newscast that the Comics Journal's Journalista! called "the future of comic news reporting," or something like that. The exact quote might not be easy to find, but that was pretty much the gist of it. In fact, in hindsight they might have actually been fucking with us. Ah Hell. Anyway, if you want to hear his take on this week's comic news, download this link. Remember, it's absolutely free. Come on, that's gotta count for something.

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Episode CXXXIII - Pavlov and Dobbes

This time, the Comic Book Haters branded comic book review podcast (tm, c, llc, lsd) takes a look at a true underdog. Fer Rule Comix is currently the hippest comic on the shelves, despite the fact that it isn't really available on many shelves. One thing's for sure, featuring a title this obscure should make us all hip and shit, like those Canadian comic book podcasts.In addition to a look at an obscure, marginally-distributed mini comic, the CBH crew also explores a virtually unheard-of we ...

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Baxter's News: Episode I

The Comic Book Haters spoke, and you, the listeners, listened. Perhaps that is what listeners do best, after all. Nonetheless, when the CBH crew sent out the call for an on-site reporter to parlay the latest happenings in the funnybook world, our offices were swamped with submissions. If you can believe that this was the best one, you certainly wouldn't be interested in hearing the others. Good old Baxter came through, though, and here we present his first full episode, complete with a nif ...

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The Cartoon Haters #5 - The Talking Magpies

Since the very inception of the Comic Book Haters podcast, the auditory prowess of the Ear has been given some taxing tasks. For the most part, our humble spectacle-hangers have been performing the lion's share of pleasure duties. With several hundred-thousand hours of aural entertainment under their belt, the Comic Book Haters have finally taken a step back to ponder the proper exploitation of each and every sense found within the human body, including the uber-rare 'Seventh Sense,' which ...

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Episode CXXXII- What's a 7-Letter-Word for "Shitty Aardvark?"

Howdy, pardners! Pull yourself up a rock, take a load off your feet from a long day of trail ridin' and enjoy a nice long draught of podcasty goodness. The ol' CBH ranch is serving up a healthy dose of hatin' on Cerebus this week. Mighty fine, if you ask me. Sloofus sure is in love with that shit-eating aardvark and Schooly, well, Ol' Schooly is his hateful self as usual.But that's not all! After the main course, the CBH serves up a delicious round of goings on around the ranch- y'know, for ...

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Episode CXXXI - Grendel vs. Palooka

Has it really been almost 100 years since Jules Bradbury and Leonardo Da Picasso created the world's first funnybook? It's probably been much longer than that, but since those two guys are fictional characters, the actual time tables don't really matter too much.Grendel has been around for almost three decades. Joe Palooka has more than tripled that. If you were to put them in a battle of longevity, Palooka would win by a landslide. Unfortunately, most people judge comics on merits far beyo ...

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Episode CXXX - Gentile Leaguery

Back for more disgusting dissertation, oh devourers of deviances? Looking to slurp some succulent sections of sanctified sacrilege? This go-round, the excitment is brought to you in thrillovating Three Dee imaging! What does that mean to you, the listener? Not much, really. It sure did give Umbrellaman a reason to show off some nifty effects, though. Enjoy the imagery, while it retains the current level of atrophation. Accept episode one hundred and thirty, earthizens.

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Episode CXXIX - Lucky Acme Freakout!

Though mainstream comics play such a pivotal role in the influence and production of all comics created anywhere ever, at times it behooves us to lay certain waste-scrappings at the gnarled feet of the so-called 'independent' breed. The esteemed creators Chris Ware and Gabrielle Bell get a dose of the old neighborhood-ribbin' in this good-natured, harmless, and legally-sanctionable 'review session.' Bell's "Lucky" is first up, followed by the latest edition of Acme Novelty Library. Both are ...

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Episode CXXVIII - Get Yer Nutts Off

The Comic Book Haters return to their most unpopular segment, Classic Comic Strip Spotlight. This time, the crack review aces take a turn towards gregariousness with a look at Charles Schulz's long-running series, Peanuts. Little foul could be said about this remarkable achievement, but sometimes the overabundant praise can seem to come off as being a little unwarranted. As such, the CBH Incorporated, Inc. partnership is proud to purvey towards fandom this unabashed, honest, and 'from the h ...

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Episode CXXVII - The CBH Ain't Nothing to Fuck With

Here is the latest episode of the Comic Book Haters funnybook-centric podcast. Presented for your amusement, the opinions and commentary by DJ Sloofus and Schooly G do not necessarily represent those of CBH Incorporated, Inc. In this episode, you will get: 1. A review of Spider-man: One More Day. 2. A review of a mini comic from candyormedicine.com. 3. The latest installment of 'Keep Off My Crap' by Dr. Gregski. 4. Other pieces of frivolty.It's really a sin to ask for much more than that, s ...

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Episode CXXVI - The Wind Between Our Cheeks

What do Harvey Kurtzman's Jungle Book and the minicomic Tales to Demolish have in common? Not much, really, but they are both being 'reviewed' on this week's episode of the Comic Book Haters. Also this week, listen in for details about how you, the listener, can obtain a FREE copy of Matthew Reilly's latest thrillscraper, The Six Stones. It's a word book, so comic fans might want to pass on it. Anyway, the publisher sent us a boxful, and instructed us to disperse them amongst our listeners, ...

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Episode CXXV - New Years and Old Tears

With a new year now upon us, let us rejoice in all that did not go wrong in the morbidly remembered 2007. Schooly, though his heart might disagree, found no comics to love throughout that year. One simply cannot fathom the paradoxical implications which could result from such an action. Neither, last year, did Umbrellaman refuse any Yuengling offered to him. Lest ye think that not a mighty task, be forewarned: Umbrellaman was offered A Lot of Yuengling last year. Had he passed on even one b ...

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Further Behind the Hatred, Though Not Quite That Far

As a special "Thank You" to all of our supporters, we here at CBHQ are offering up a special value. First off, the Comic Book Haters are giving you something you already have, under the guise of a mid-season "Writer's Strike" rerun presentation. That's right, we're sending out (once again, mind you) the very first CBH Special, "Behind the Hatred." New listeners can finally learn the secret origin of the Haters. Old listeners can use the time to ponder all that has gone wrong in their lives ...

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Schooly's Xmas Carol

Merry Christmas everyone! From everyone here at CBHHQ, have a great holiday season!Click here to hear the riveting ripoff... er... tale of Schooly's Xmas Carol.

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The Cartoon Haters #3 - Betty Boop

As a special Holiday Treat to our legion of fans, the Comic Book Haters will be temporarily transformed, once again, into the Cartoon Haters. Longtime followers will remember that the Cartoon Haters bear a striking resemblance to their similarly-named alter-egos. This go-round, the world's sweetheart, Betty Boop, is placed in the spotlight. It's a video episode, so if your iPod isn't parsed for pictures, purchase a replacement! The holiday hilarity begins here, and will run throughout the m ...

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Episode CXXIV - Wish You Weren't Here

This episode, we're working under the assumption that no one actually reads these blog posts. If you're of the temperament that just wants to listen to the episodes, please stop reading right now. If you actually enjoy the blog posts, feel free to read this sentence as well. You see, writing these entires takes up an inordinate amount of time; time which can be better spent doing other things, such as reading funnybooks. Perhaps shorter entries will please both those who love and loathe the ...

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Episode CXXIII - Our Public Affair

Perhaps it was destiny, or (more likely) fate. Perhaps God itself intervened on behalf of sweet lady Fickle; all that is known is that something saw fit to unite the Comic Book Haters with My Secret Romance #44, published by Charlton Comics. This special occasion marks the first time the CBH Podcast Crew spent their time 'reviewing' a romance comic. Real sticklers might count Golden Plates as a love story, but the multiple wive storyline really watered it down. Those who enjoy a well-built ...

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Episode CXXII - Where Writes.... the WRITER!

For this, the fifteenth consecutive "Very Special Episode" of the Comic Book Haters podcast, the two erstwhile reviewers set their sights on La-La Land herself, Lady Hollywood. Once the home of glitzy paramours, hard-luck wannabees, and an assorted assemblage of asinine onlookers, the Sister-City of Angels is now ground-zero in an epic battle of good versus evil. Who will win? Who will die? Who will discover what that fucking island on Lost really is? Not the viewers, but leave it to DJ Slo ...

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Episode CXXI- As the Schooly Turns

Hey! The Roman numerals are back! Thanks to everyone who pitched in and found them.Join our intrepid trio as they uncover the seedier side of Hawaii in Night Fisher.And what's funnier than Golden Plates? What's filled with more laughs than a barrel full of dead mimes? The Trial of Colonel Sweeto, that's what, asshole. THIS IS THE FUNNIEST GODDAMN BOOK EVER WRITTEN. Go buy it so the guy can publish another one.Also in this episode: another installment of Ask FPR! Now with bonus CLIFFHANGER!C ...

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Episode 120- Too Hot to Handle, Too Drunk to Care

Subtitle: Who the hell stole all my Roman numerals?Join the CBH crew as they discuss JLA: The Nail.Can you guess who the special guest is in this week's episode?It's Comic Book Robot.There is also another Schooly's Pick in this episode.Umbrellaman is drunk in this episode.Man, I'm depressed.Click here, if you want to. If not, I understand completely.

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Episode 119 - The Walking Braindead

Once again, the night comes alive with horrible acts, devious miscreants, and foul-mouthed podcast hosts. The Halloween Season is upon us, and everyone within earshot should head for the basement before this army of mental zombies arrives on their doorsteps. It's the Halloween Special, and the Comic Book Haters have rassled up a bevvy of holiday-themed titles to pour over during the witching hour. Be sure to stay tuned until the very end for a revelation so creepy, so horrible, so utterly f ...

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Episode CXVIII - Shulk Fu

Anyone who has bothered to stick around this long knows what to expect from a Comic Book Haters podcast episode. Sure, there are curse words, inane observations, over the top nerdiness and lots of drinks flowing, but what does it all mean? What purpose do these podcasts serve? Have you ever stopped to think about that? Well, this one in particular provides the world with a much-needed critical review of Jim Starlin's "Death of the New Gods" number one, and a glimpse at an old She-Hulk comic ...

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Episode CXVII - Beyond Numeric Comprehension

What do long-term listeners of the Comic Book Haters podcast know? Probably not very much, but a few things might stick in their mind (or, at the very least, their craw). Foremost amongst these treasured memories is the fact that Schooly G carries deep within his heart a limitless surplus of love for the Generally Infant ones, G.I. Joe. This time, the CBH Podcast crew is joined by Canadian Ryan O'Hara, who is currently involved in a plethora of projects, which are quite possibly provided fo ...

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Episode CXVI - Down? Left up, Right!

Ahhh, to be young and in love. Or, to be young and playing video games. They both get you to pretty much the same place. In this instance, it's to a comic book review podcast. This go-round, the Comic Book Haters are pleasing both sides of the coin: those who like video games, and those who like comic books about video games! Who says versatility is a dead word? Join DJ Sloofus and Schooly G for an 'outsider's gander' at the Halo comic book and the Resident Evil 3 movie. It's not at 'snarky ...

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Episode CXV- Ol' Iron Sloof

When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one podcast to drink lots of beer and talk about shitty comics and nerd culture, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires them to declare that comics suck and are deserving of mankind's disdain. This is the record of that disdain.*Please join Sloofus, Umbrellaman, and Schooly in their declaration of things that suck. For instance, in this episode, the boys review Girls by the Luna brothers and the Iron Man trailer. Al ...

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Episode CXIV- Steve Canyon: Don't Ask, Don't Tell

Doesn't he look just fabulous? What a rakish tilt that hat has! I swear, his swagger is practically obscene; OBSCENE, I tell you!Well, he looks like a bit of rough trade to me, I don't mind telling you. Well, I wouldn't kick him out of my cockpit if the ride gets a little turbulent, if you catch my drift! You're so bad! I'll bet he's got notches on his belt for every bogey he's ever splashed. And I'll bet he's on his third or fourth belt by now! You're such a bitch, Schooly. Really!Join ...

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Episode CXIII - My Fate; My Hate!

In a daring attempt to placate hatred fans of all cultural backgrounds, the Comic Book Haters present an episode fortified heavily with both banal mediocrity and purposefully oblique artiste comix. Marvel's 'whitey with a hammer' masterpiece, Thor, is paid his proper venerations. As is the indie (i.e., published tri-yearly) title, Uptight. Can you think of a better way to relax than by shutting down your mind, grabbing an ice cold glass of lemonade, and listening to the latest episode of t ...

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Episode CXII - Yesterday Returns...Again!

For this special "Retro Episode" of the Comic Book Haters, a special guest-host is presumably flattered to provide the necessary explanations..Fake Peter Rios here, gang! Don't worry about impregnating your mother, you haven't traveled back in time! This is a special representation of The Comic Book Haters: Episode One with bonus material by me, Fake Peter Rios! If you've never heard the episode before this is your chance, if you have you'll want to listen to it again to hear all of the thi ...

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Episode CXI - Classic Strip Spotlight #1: Smilin' Jack

Is it that time already? Is it time for the Comic Book Haters to celebrate all that is good within the world of funnybooks? You betcha, buddy, and unless you've been stranded on an island with Fat Stuff for the past twenty years, you know that means one thing and one thing only: hijinx and derring-do! Will Schooly G's love of the aviationary arts overcome his disdain for comics? If any strip can warm away the ice walls that surround his heart, it's Zack Mosely's Smilin' Jack. SPOILER WARNIN ...

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Episode CX - I.O.Boo

SHOW NOTES: 1. A beer was opened. 2. The Comic Book Haters reviewed Booster Gold #1. 3. Some extremely lame jokes were made. 3. Schooly became belligerent. 4. A song about the Umbrellaman was played. 4. Someone burped. 5. The boys looked at Lewis Trondheim's Mister O and Mister I. 6. Sloofus became inwardly upset that no one liked the comics. 7. Umbrellaman wondered to himself why he was still hanging around with these two idiots. 8. Schooly G suppressed the urge to vomit. 9. Sloofus vomite ...

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Episode CIX - Alas, Poor Schooly, I Knew Him, Umbrellaman

Much like the celebrated buffoons of Shakespeare's time, Obnoxio the Clown helped teach a nation how to laugh again. His modern counterpart, one Schooly G, selects Obnoxio's misbegotten encounter with the Uncanny X-Men as his "Pick of the Week" this go round. In addition to the aforementioned meeting of the mendicants, this episode also features some spicy dialogue, raucous harlotry, and general misbehaving. The extremely independent title "Wasted Minute" is given a second look, one of very ...

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Episode CIX - Alas, Poor Schooly, I Knew Him, Umbrellaman

Much like the celebrated buffoons of Shakespeare's time, Obnoxio the Clown helped teach a nation how to laugh again. His modern counterpart, one Schooly G, selects Obnoxio's misbegotten encounter with the Uncanny X-Men as his "Pick of the Week" this go round. In addition to the aforementioned meeting of the mendicants, this episode also features some spicy dialogue, raucous harlotry, and general misbehaving. The extremely independent title "Wasted Minute" is given a second look, one of very ...

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Episode CVIII - Le Nord Tiennent le premier rôle Le Robinet De Goûts

Le Canada, Oh Canada ! Comment nous aimons entendre parler de vos systèmes sans limites de soins de santé, de votre lumière débordante de Coors, et de vos équipes merveilleuses d'hockey. Comme Américains, nous pleurons constamment à nos formes inférieures de gouvernement, et au fait que Dave Sim ne nous a pas rendu visite pendant beaucoup de mois. Svp, le Canada, nous une faveur et nous enseigner comment aimer encore ? Pour le moins, écoutez le podcast comique de Haters de livre. ...

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Episode CVIII - Le Nord Tiennent le premier rôle Le Robinet De Goûts

Le Canada, Oh Canada ! Comment nous aimons entendre parler de vos systèmes sans limites de soins de santé, de votre lumière débordante de Coors, et de vos équipes merveilleuses d'hockey. Comme Américains, nous pleurons constamment à nos formes inférieures de gouvernement, et au fait que Dave Sim ne nous a pas rendu visite pendant beaucoup de mois. Svp, le Canada, nous une faveur et nous enseigner comment aimer encore ? Pour le moins, écoutez le podcast comique de Haters de livre. ...

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Episode CVII - Back By Popular Disgust

If the Comic Book Haters are talking about the Amazing Spider-Man, that can mean only one thing: Cappy's back! Please listen anyway. Also this episode, a look at the latest issue of Optic Nerve, penned by everyone's favorite darling of the indie scene, Adrian Tomine. All this, plus more listener submissions, hijinx, and general buffoonery. Some more specific buffoonery may be included towards the end. Click here to listen to the episode, before they're all gone! Also, the search for a new f ...

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Episode CVII - Back By Popular Disgust

If the Comic Book Haters are talking about the Amazing Spider-Man, that can mean only one thing: Cappy's back! Please listen anyway. Also this episode, a look at the latest issue of Optic Nerve, penned by everyone's favorite darling of the indie scene, Adrian Tomine. All this, plus more listener submissions, hijinx, and general buffoonery. Some more specific buffoonery may be included towards the end. Click here to listen to the episode, before they're all gone! Also, the search for a new f ...

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Episode CV - To Schooly, With Hate

They don't make women like Mary Perkins anymore. Once bitten, twice shy, this lovely lass has run the gamut of relationship woes. Leonard Starr spent countless hours of his life depicting her exploits, when he could have been out 'making it' with real, live women instead. The Comic Book Haters take a close look at this classic comic strip, which apparently is only deemed such because it is old. Also, a lesser-known collection entitled "Maus: A Survivor's Story" is finally given some much ne ...

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Episode CV - To Schooly, With Hate

They don't make women like Mary Perkins anymore. Once bitten, twice shy, this lovely lass has run the gamut of relationship woes. Leonard Starr spent countless hours of his life depicting her exploits, when he could have been out 'making it' with real, live women instead. The Comic Book Haters take a close look at this classic comic strip, which apparently is only deemed such because it is old. Also, a lesser-known collection entitled "Maus: A Survivor's Story" is finally given some much ne ...

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CBH: Annual #1

Inspired by a once-mighty comic book tradition which now lay dormant, slowly withering on the vine, the Comic Book Haters present to you their very first "Annual." Consider this an 'extra' episode this week. Not because of the expediency of its delivery, but rather for its plethora of insight, information, and opinions. In an era which the monthly installmant (ironically referred to as 'chapbooks' by the uber-literates) is about as environmentally potent as a three-legged mammoth wading in ...

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CBH: Annual #1

Inspired by a once-mighty comic book tradition which now lay dormant, slowly withering on the vine, the Comic Book Haters present to you their very first "Annual." Consider this an 'extra' episode this week. Not because of the expediency of its delivery, but rather for its plethora of insight, information, and opinions. In an era which the monthly installmant (ironically referred to as 'chapbooks' by the uber-literates) is about as environmentally potent as a three-legged mammoth wading in ...

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Episode CIV - A Shitstorm of Torrential Proportions

The Comic Book Haters can never be deemed unworthy of your eternal love and kisses. They must always remain within your heart's prayers, no matter how drunk you get. Were they to be remissed, even for the slightest of seconds, it would be a grevious error indeed. For you see, dear listener, the Comic Book Haters love you. They cherish your every thought, pine over each action you take, and even watch over you as you make poo-poo. Here's your chance to get even, by listening in to their late ...

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Episode CIV - A Shitstorm of Torrential Proportions

The Comic Book Haters can never be deemed unworthy of your eternal love and kisses. They must always remain within your heart's prayers, no matter how drunk you get. Were they to be remissed, even for the slightest of seconds, it would be a grevious error indeed. For you see, dear listener, the Comic Book Haters love you. They cherish your every thought, pine over each action you take, and even watch over you as you make poo-poo. Here's your chance to get even, by listening in to their late ...

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Outside the Comic Book Haters Studio IX - Chris Wisnia

The Comic Book Haters are proud to venture outside of their own domain and into the realm of one Chris Wisnia. The indie-sensation, best known as the creator of Dr. DeBunko and Doris Danger, engages himself in a conversation about old monster comics, self-publishing, and the afterlife. Wisnia's dead-on recreations of the classic Atlas horror comics of the 1950s are essential reading for anyone interested in the genre. Perhaps 'recreations' isn't quite the proper term, as the stories Wisnia ...

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Outside the Comic Book Haters Studio IX - Chris Wisnia

The Comic Book Haters are proud to venture outside of their own domain and into the realm of one Chris Wisnia. The indie-sensation, best known as the creator of Dr. DeBunko and Doris Danger, engages himself in a conversation about old monster comics, self-publishing, and the afterlife. Wisnia's dead-on recreations of the classic Atlas horror comics of the 1950s are essential reading for anyone interested in the genre. Perhaps 'recreations' isn't quite the proper term, as the stories Wisnia ...

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Episode CIII - Pre-traumatic Stress Disorders

Ahhh, Sinestro. Remember when things were different? You had a job, a military pension, and some of the snazziest duds this side of Djunubistan III. Well, in retrospect, your birth name probably should have prepared you for the sordid path your life would eventually take. What have you been up to lately? What's that? Forging your own army? Well, that just sounds like a ridiculous idea. Is this really the life you envisioned for yourself? Even these two assholes are making fun of you.

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Episode CIII - Pre-traumatic Stress Disorders

Ahhh, Sinestro. Remember when things were different? You had a job, a military pension, and some of the snazziest duds this side of Djunubistan III. Well, in retrospect, your birth name probably should have prepared you for the sordid path your life would eventually take. What have you been up to lately? What's that? Forging your own army? Well, that just sounds like a ridiculous idea. Is this really the life you envisioned for yourself? Even these two assholes are making fun of you.

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Episode CII - An Epic For Our Minds

Often, Friday the 13th forebodes death, doom and delinquent payments. For this particular occurrence, however, it can be considered quite the boon, at least for listeners of the Comic Book Haters' podcast. Join the erstwhile commentators as they fulfill their namesake towards the debut issue of Skull Pen, preceded by a deconstruction of Garth Ennis's controversial new title, The Boys. Click here to obtain this warding against evil. Visit Skull Pen's homeworld at this location.

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Episode CII - An Epic For Our Minds

Often, Friday the 13th forebodes death, doom and delinquent payments. For this particular occurrence, however, it can be considered quite the boon, at least for listeners of the Comic Book Haters' podcast. Join the erstwhile commentators as they fulfill their namesake towards the debut issue of Skull Pen, preceded by a deconstruction of Garth Ennis's controversial new title, The Boys. Click here to obtain this warding against evil. Visit Skull Pen's homeworld at this location.

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Episode CI - Rampaging Haters

Wow, has it been a week already? It seems like much more time has passed. Oh well, that must be what happens to you when you get old. The Comic Book Haters podcast returns with a look at this summer's uber-shitfest, World War Hulk. Also included this week is a look at Comic Book Headlines, as compiled by Schooly G. Pull up a chair in the Funnybook Dungeon (there are four of them) and join in on the fun, won't you? Click here, everybody's doing it.

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Episode CI - Rampaging Haters

Wow, has it been a week already? It seems like much more time has passed. Oh well, that must be what happens to you when you get old. The Comic Book Haters podcast returns with a look at this summer's uber-shitfest, World War Hulk. Also included this week is a look at Comic Book Headlines, as compiled by Schooly G. Pull up a chair in the Funnybook Dungeon (there are four of them) and join in on the fun, won't you? Click here, everybody's doing it.

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Episode C - The Man in the Comic Hater's Mask

At long last, though not lasting too long, the Comic Book Haters resent their 100th episode. What does that mean for you, the listener? More reviews! More arguments! More anecdotes! More headaches, and basically more bullshit to fast forward through. This episode is twice as long as usual, so make sure to set aside a little extra time for your 'listening party' with the rest of the gang. Click here to be part of this momentous occassion.

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The Cartoon Haters: Episode #2

CULLED FROM THE PAGES OF THE INTERNET ARCHIVE....Once again, the Cartoon Haters plunder the interweb's massive vault of public domain materials as fodder for their particular brand of side-splitting 'edu-tainment.' Cast your memory back, dear children, to a time when we knew our enemy, were defending a noble culture (or two), and weren't afraid to eat meat out of the can. If you can't remember that golden era, just think of World War II instead. They all seem pretty much the same.Anyone dow ...

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Episode XCIX- That 70s Podcast

Wow- 99th episode. And you wasted it on two shitty comics from the 70s? What were you thinking? I hope the comics were at least enjoyable. They weren't? What comics did you review? HULK 181?!?! What the fuck was so special about that one? Oh, it was the one with the Wendigo. Anything else? Wolverine? That dude with the claws, right? What was the other comic? Star Wars! I love Star Wars! Oh- the comic sucks? Why? Yeah, I guess Lucas would have made the comic first if it really was a good ide ...

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Episode XCIX- That 70s Podcast

Wow- 99th episode. And you wasted it on two shitty comics from the 70s? What were you thinking? I hope the comics were at least enjoyable. They weren't? What comics did you review? HULK 181?!?! What the fuck was so special about that one? Oh, it was the one with the Wendigo. Anything else? Wolverine? That dude with the claws, right? What was the other comic? Star Wars! I love Star Wars! Oh- the comic sucks? Why? Yeah, I guess Lucas would have made the comic first if it really was a good ide ...

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The Cartoon Haters: Episode 1

It's Memorial Day, and the Comic Book Haters crew is remembering everyone who has gone before them. In honor of all those who died in Civil War, the Infinite Crisis, the Korvac Saga, Secret Wars I, Secret Wars II, Secret War, No Man's Land, the Infinity War, War of the Gods, Crisis on Infinite Earths, the Secret Sacred Wars, 52, the Kree-Skrull War, the Clone Wars, the Atlantis Attacks war, the Evolutionary War, House of M, the Contest of Champions, the Extinction Agenda, Total Eclipse, the ...

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The Cartoon Haters: Episode 1

It's Memorial Day, and the Comic Book Haters crew is remembering everyone who has gone before them. In honor of all those who died in Civil War, the Infinite Crisis, the Korvac Saga, Secret Wars I, Secret Wars II, Secret War, No Man's Land, the Infinity War, War of the Gods, Crisis on Infinite Earths, the Secret Sacred Wars, 52, the Kree-Skrull War, the Clone Wars, the Atlantis Attacks war, the Evolutionary War, House of M, the Contest of Champions, the Extinction Agenda, Total Eclipse, the ...

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Episode XCVIII - Don't Ask... Just Download It!

Are you sure you want to download this podcast? I mean, really, really sure? Let's face it... it's hardly 'entertaining,' even in the loosest sense of the word. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of other comic book podcasts out there; why not give one of them a try? After all, most of them give listeners some insightful commentary about Spider-man's newest costume, the after-effects of Civil War, or even the inevitable return of Barry "The Flash" Allen. All this one really does is swear a ...

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Episode XCVIII - Don't Ask... Just Download It!

Are you sure you want to download this podcast? I mean, really, really sure? Let's face it... it's hardly 'entertaining,' even in the loosest sense of the word. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of other comic book podcasts out there; why not give one of them a try? After all, most of them give listeners some insightful commentary about Spider-man's newest costume, the after-effects of Civil War, or even the inevitable return of Barry "The Flash" Allen. All this one really does is swear a ...

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Episode XCVII- Free Comic Day? More Like Free Shit Paper Day.

Good evening. May I present to you a podcast, finely crafted and lovingly produced and hosted by the Internet's two most irritating personalities? I may? Well, then, please enjoy this podcast of the Comic Book Haters, free of charge- though it will cost you about 30 of your precious Earth-minutes. Listen in rapt awe as Schooly and Sloofus discuss the modern era of Supes and Free Comic Book Day 2007.Don't miss the Pittsburgh ComicCon field report filed by our own SF Rick, owner and proprieto ...

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Episode XCVI - Who Can Stop the Umbrellanaught?

Ye Gods! Is it Tuesday already? In some parts of the world, it's already Wednesday, and in one remote corner it's actually a week ago from last Thursday. Regardless, we can all join together in welcoming the latest addition to the Comic Book Haters' podcast family, Episode 96! During this "funformational episode," the Haters take a look, once again, at this week's comic book news. Also debuting this week: Schooly's Picks, a new segment. Left untethered within the bowels of the Funnybook Du ...

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Episode XCV - Nobody Puts Schooly in the Corner

Rejoice, fellow haters! Schooly G has returned triumphant, and has the stitches and razor burns to prove it. Join him as he reunites with old pals DJ Sloofus, Umbrellaman, and you, dear listener. The trio of troglodytes takes a brash look at Josh Latta's latest mini comic, "Rashy Rabbit." Also on the chopping block is a listener-submitted topic, 'The Many Loves of Spider-Woman.' Finally, the episode features a recap of last week's Toronto Comic-Con by forum member Stiltfan. Those who avoid ...

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Episode XCIV - What the Fuck, Is Schooly Still Gone?!?

Could it really be so? Has Schooly G finally left the Comic Book Haters' podcast, amidst a flurry of accusations and acriminations? Are the rumors about his funnybook habits actually true? Will he really avoid a string of rhetorical interrogations? Is 'acriminations' even a word? There's only one way to find out, faithful follower, and it ain't too pretty. Check out the latest episode of the Comic Book Haters, in which DJ Sloofus, Umbrellaman, and Groothe review US #1, but stay far away fro ...

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Episode XCIII - Thank Fuck, Schooly's Gone

Schooly G has gone missing! Who could be behind this nefarious plot? Who would dare abscond with our medium's most mediocre medium? The soothsayer of shit, Schooly G himself! Missing! Gone! Was it premeditated, or a case of instantaneous revenge? Lord knows, the man has angered enough individuals to warrant the death sentence on twelve systems. Will he be back? Undoubtedly, but don't let that assuage you as you listen to this episode, which we could only title... "Schooly's Out for th ...

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Episode XCII - Challenge of the Dopefriends

This is it, true beweeders! The Dopefiend rounds out his weeklong venture into the throngs (and bongs) of the Funnybook Dungeon with a look at the latest happenings within the comic book community. Join him, won't you, as he embraces Schooly G, DJ Sloofus, and their hedonistic lifestyle. For all of you first time listeners, allow us to get you up to date. Longtime follwers, please indulge us for a moment. In brief, DJ Sloofus loves comic books. Schooly G represents the 'outsider's pe ...

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Episode XCI - The Dope Knight Triumphant

Most thought of him as an urban legend; an old tale told to frighten children against the horrors of sobriety. Always enveloped in a cloud of emerald mist, this mysterious captain of cannabis leaves behind him a trail of confusion, delusion, and in one instance, absolution. It's been a long time since he's been seen around these parts, but the Dopefiend is back to bring some green tinted commentary to the Comic Book Haters' podcast. This time around, the boys take a look at fellow Briton Pe ...

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Episode XC - Lo the Mighty, Down with Whitey

Today's fast paced world makes it virtually impossible to keep up with the latest happenings within the funnybook community. In fact, it almost seems like no one even cares what happens within it. For the sake of this episode, we're presupposing that you do care, though a background knowledge isn't really neccessary to enjoy the forthcoming proceedings. Virtually nothing will help you enjoy the forthcoming proceedings, actually. Maybe some of those pills that Grandpa keeps up on top of his ...

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Episode LXXXIX- If Flatulence Be the Food of Cappy, Fart On...

Join those lovable drunks the Comic Book Haters as they blunder through another episode of hilarious hijinx(tm). How long can their livers take this? Will this be the episode where cirrhosis finally catches up with Umbrellaman? No, it isn't. But listen in anyway as the boys review Pep #22 and the new Spiderman 3 Trailer. Grab a drink, sit back,click here to download the episode, and be content with the fact that you have never been in the same room as Cappy and his amazing repeating asshole ...

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Episode LXXXVIII - The Umbrellaman of Steel

For generations, only Comic Book Hater brand podcasts have been synonymous with 'trust.' That's because Comic Book Hater podcasts brewers are the only ones on the market that still value taste, flavor, and a fresh, crisp satisfaction that comes with every listen. Don't settle for big promises and fancy colors; the CBH brand products are the only ones you'll need to help liven up a dull morning. Fasten your fun belts, thrill riders! This one's a non-stop roller coaster into the pits of ...

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Giant Size CBH #2: Cappy America Calling

Now that Marvel's "Civil War" mega event is over, we can all breath a sigh of relief. Hey, watch it asshole, we're actually monitoring these things. That wasn't the kind of 'relief' we're talking about. Regardless, the Comic Book Haters crew takes a retrospective look at the future of the Marvel universe. Remember, Schooly pretty much hates this shit, so don't expect any intuitive glances or possible realities. It's just a bunch of horsehit, really. Click here to register, even though ...

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Episode LXXXVII- Is That Freedom Rock? Turn It Up, Man!

Hello, true Haters. We're back and comin' right at you with a fistful of fabulous Frank Miller Fury. Join the Haters this week as they talk about life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and Frank Miller's 300 and Dark Knight Returns. As the Umbrellaman always says, "Sit back and enjoy the episode. And bring out the crazy Asian bitches! And not the one you gave me last time- 'love me long time,' my ass! I paid for 30 minutes, that's what I expect!" Is that the Comic Book Haters? Wel ...

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Episode LXXXVI - Schoolyesque

Stand Erect, Errant Individuals! Jack “King” Kirby is given the royal treatment as the brave bastions of banality, Schooly G and Sloofus, take a thrilling look at the Forever People number two! One of the cohosts loved it; the other hated it. Can you figure out the shocking twist before we reveal it? Whatever you do, don’t dare reveal the climax to your friends, neighbors, or Aunt Bessina! Also this episode, a guest appearance from your friendly, neighborhood Umbrellaman! Accept ...

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Episode LXXXVb- Bootleg!

In this unofficial recording made in the CBH Funnybook Dungeon, the boys spotlight Salt Peter Press. Join the fun by cli cking here. Or don't click there, and you will never know the overflowing love and joy that only the Comic Book Haters bring to mankind.

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Episode LXXXVa- Home Is Where the Fart Is

Sometimes, you just want to have your cake and eat it, too. In this riveting installment of the Comic Book Haters award-winning podcast*, the boys take a look at DCandMarvel. Can you believe it? When will this mad, whirlwind-existence ever end?Join in on the laffs(TM) as the crew "read"the newest issues of Action Comics Annual and Astonishing X-men.Click here to feel loved and one with the universe.*The Cappy's Choice Award

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Episode LXXXIV - Haters Against Heroes

Even Haters must make time to love. In this very special episode, the Comic Book Haters join together to help stomp out world hunger, as they take a look at a comic that dared to make a difference. Heroes Against Hunger #1 is reviewed, leaving all in attendance wondering why a second issue was never published. Quite possibly it's because the entire endeavor was a pandering pile of dog shit.Click here to download the episode, and then please donate some money to these hungry little tykes.

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Episode LXXXIII - Sloofless

Somewhere in the vast realms of the Funnybook Nation, a nerd wanders alone. Ever searching for the greatest comic book ever created, he will continue on his quest for eternity, if need be. What does this pretentious nonsense mean to you, the listener? Basically that Sloofus is not in this episode. He most assuredly won't be missed. During Sloofus' absence, the remaining CBH podcast crew engage their wits in a mighty battle of 20 Questions. Yes, apparently this is really what passes f ...

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Episode LXXXII- Warren Ellis and CBH Reunited! (And it feels soooo good!)

Join in the fun as your favorite Comic Book Hating Crew is back in action! This is the real deal, folks. You've tried other podcasts. Some disgusted you; others may have made you feel like you were suffering an anal fissure in a swimming pool full of salt water. The Comic Book Haters Podcast Episode 82 is guaranteed to leave you sated, but begging for more! Join the crew as they have a touching reunion with an old friend. Also, they review two shit-rags called Thunderbolts and New U ...

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