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#180: “I’ve Played This Game With You Before” I recently had a strange encounter at my local Ralphs grocery store. An encounter that suddenly felt like an incident and almost became an altercation. I don’t know if the cashier mistook me for a shoplifter or a serial killer or if he just hates handling “returns,” but after getting nowhere with the store or [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Pill Refill: “We are all Fairport”
This is a “Pill Refill,” a revisiting of my 2007 podcast, “We are all Fairport.” This “Best Of” episode was requested by Mike Hamilton of The Disney Podcast Directory. Thanks, Mike, for encouraging me to put this out again.
———————————————————–
From the original 2007 blog post:
Twenty-five years ago, I graduated from Fairport High S ... Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #174: ENTER: Cousin Ronny
Despite what you are about to hear, the producers of The Bitterest Pill do not condone, nor to their guests condone, any of the following: drug use, pornography, breaking and entering, firearms, discussing Hugh Jackman’s sexuality, making fun of poodle-toting transvestites, living with the officially insane, cooking eggs with a cappuccino steamer, or beating up [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | First Three Chapters of “Jack Wakes Up”Since Seth was just over, and since his book “drops” tomorrow on Cinco de Harwood, I thought I’d pass along to you the first three chapters of JACK WAKES UP, see if that moves the needle any…
I LOVE this book and think you will too. Check it out.
Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #172: Dan Wakes Up and Seth Moves the Needle
Yesterday, I thought I woke up after having had a slight heart attack. Luckily I had just slept funny.
Later, crime-noir author/podcaster SETH HARWOOD came over the watch the big game and hang out in Studio G. Yes, Seth and Dan and Hudson live in the garage!
We talk about Hill Street Blues, LA Festival of Books, [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #169: Sleeping in the OceanWe went on a “Mammal Search.” In the rain.
Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #164: I’m Just Being Parentnoid
I talk a bit about my latest trip to Costco, by way of The Diaper Genie. Trust me, there is no actual genie inside The Diaper Genie. Just big plastic poop-sausage.
I have always believed that running in flip-flops is a bad idea, especially on the sidewalk. And, unfortunately, I was proven right.
It turns out I’m [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #161: MoanMA
We took the kids to MoMA in New York City. Well, we took Hudson to MoMA, Princess T and I had a date…
The “Free Month of Premium Pill” offer has been extended until Martin Luther King Jr. Day (Jan. 19th). See the “Holiday Offer” (right) for details.
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Download #161: MoanMAListen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | My gift to you - 30 days of Premuim Pill FREEI couldn’t afford a tacky sweater for each of my listeners, so I settled on this: Thirty days of Premium Pill, FREE.
Just sign up before January 7th with NO OBLIGATION and get access to all the current Premium content for 30 days. Cancel if you’d like at the end of the month, no sweat.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
Powered [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #159: Christmas Time is Here AgainHAPPY HOLIDAYS!
I talk about The Winter Program and saving seats, and how a mail order company ruined Christmas, then I read “Oh, Christmas Tree.”
Help Scott Sigler make the New York Times Best Seller List. Preorder Contagious NOW!
Thanks to Animal Rescue Force Friends for their great version of “We Wish You a Merry [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #153 - Vote for Cousin Barry
Today marks the 4th Anniversary of The Bitterest Pill. And, I think it’s time again to speak freely…
Okay, sort of freely. Really, I don’t say anything except this: I WANT an elitist President. I don’t want a president who I could see myself “having a beer” with. I want a president [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Send your Bat or Vampire drawing in for ARFF Halloween Special
Hey, ARFF! viewers! We want to put YOU on ARFF! Well, your drawing anyway!
We’re getting ready for our Batty About Bats Halloween Special and if you send us a bat or vampire drawing it could be included in the show!
E-mail digital files to info@arff.tv, or snail-mail drawings to:
ARFF! Batty About Bats
JacketMedia.com
8939 S. Sepulveda Blvd., Ste110-713
Los [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #149: Nine and a Half YearsThe kids and I went to Target to shop for Halloween decor, ate burgers, played with dry ice and realized that half time has passed.
We had snacks at the Starbucks inside the Target. Better than having lunch at the McDonalds inside the Home Depot.
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Download #149: Nine and a Half YearsListen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #146: Three Minutes and Two HoursToday is the first day that both the kids are in school for a full day. Wow. Of course, I thought I’d spend much of my new free time running Hudson’s snack over to him just in the nick of time…
I’m still getting my neighbor’s computer situation straightened out. I got the impression that the [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | BONUS: Bitterest Obsidian
As a bonus, while I wrap up my vacation and head off to the New Media Expo, here is my contribution to J.C. Hutchins' "7th Son: Obsidian.
Also, check out mixed media magazine/site Verge of LA, which includes my “How To Meet Any Woman You Want, Guaranteed.”
And, of course, meet me at Coverville 500 at Bally’s [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #140: Breathe In, Breathe Out
Today I talk about the shocking events at the dojo and how I need to get even more exercise (and that’s an order). Also, we tented the house this past week, which was supposed to force me to take a few days off of working and running around and worrying and all that. [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #135: Can You Answer Your Phone Please?I had to go to New York City. I had to bring a large video camera and tripod with me, as well as a pressed shirt and pants. We had to fly in on Monday, video tape something at the crack of dawn Tuesday, and fly back to Los Angeles. It was [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #129: Chutes and LaddersThis time around I discuss a startling revelation about one of my listeners. Namely, his address. All because I killed my keyboard with one of those white “magic sponge” things.
I can’t seem to beat my kids at Chutes & Ladders. Ever. What is the universe trying to tell me?
I tell the [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #126: Jury Doodie / Explosive AfternoonApparently, I no longer am able to automatically get out of jury duty. Great…
Gotta work the system? Just slop on some Smiley Greeze! It works wonders!
I have got to stop guzzling caffiene, eating freezer pancakes and chocolate covered coffee beans, and get a night’s sleep. And, for some reason I [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #120: I Talk About Puppies/Melissas BackWhy, why, why do I have to lose my voice every time I get even the smallest cold? Can’t you just keep your little snot-faucet of a kid home from school for a day or two so I don’t have to suck a Ludens for five days?
I talk about American Idle, I ask Tim [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Helga Rules: An Update
Hello. Remember me? My name is Helga. I am the Eastern European dominatrix who performs the voice of Dan’s computer. How are you? Whatever.
As you are probably guessing by now, Dan has no new episode of The Bitterest Pill for you this week. Even though he promised he would [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #119: Drowned in a River, Lined with Eggs
I encourage everyone to listen to last week’s Ben Sander interview, I finally tell the truth about my dramatic pauses, we get nostalgic about Hiro, I reveal the “HBO-ing” of Bitterest Pill.
Guys need to bring back the sexy again for the very first time, again.
TODAY’S FABLE: I broke the first rule of male friendship, and [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #118: It Should Be $20/Ben SanderDownload 118: Should Be $20/Ben Sander
First we talk about Business Traveler #2, communication break downs, my interviewing skills, the truth about my dementia and the high price of Zyrtec this week.
Then I talk with Brini Maxwell creator Ben Sander, my guru of mid-century chic. Check out Ben’s new on-line retail spot, Felix Populi.
Digg [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Animal Rescue Force Friends! is now on-lineDownload ARFF #1: "I'm Not Lion"The first episode of Animal Rescue Force Friends is finally on-line.
Hudson is going to update the ARFF.tv website over the next couple of days, but the video is finally on the web. It’s the episode we showed at the New Media Expo in September with a few changes, a [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #117: MetamorphosisDownload 117: MetamorphosisWe are having one of those sit down “talks” we all end up in every so often. It’s time to reevaluate how things are going, and grow the hell up. My wife and I went over our family expenses and came to a realization: we can’t afford our life.
We talk about [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #116: Happy (its a) New Year
From DIRECTLY under the flight path at Los Angeles International Airport…
Man, you can tell it’s been a while, since ramble on for over an hour. Sorry, but I had a lot to get off my chest. We talk about how the planes take off, viruses, Mt. Saint Helens, Hoover Dam, the Senior [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Happy Holidays from The Bitterest PillMay you be filled with the true spirit of the holidays!
I’ve been battling a virus that’s going around, so my holiday podcast plans have been shot. Accept this as a visual podcast and I’ll talk to you soon. All my best to you and yours. - dK
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Share [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #115: Suppertime is HereDownload #115: Suppertime is Here
I was Charlie Brown, but I got letters from a secret admirer…
Happy Holidays
——————————————————-
Thomas Marriott, Bill Anschell, Jeff Johnson, John Bishop
“Christmas Time is Here” (mp3)
from “The Cool Season - An Origin Records Holiday Collection, Vol. 2″
(Origin Records)
Buy at iTunes Music Store
Buy at Rhapsody
Bu ... Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #114: Esther Rolle and the Weak ConnectionsDownload #114: Esther Rolle and the Weak Connections
I can’t seem to steal a decent internet connection to save my life. But, at least I got the City of Los Angeles to take my picture, and they only charged me $500!
I talk about escarole, Esther Rolle, Panera, Twitter…
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Share This Episode! [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #113: If It Gets You, FightDownload #113: If It Gets You, Fight
This time: my favorite tea, we read and discuss listener mail, Gullo prompts a discussion of Senator Larry Craig…we talk Barking Spiders at Fairport High, George Carlin and his 7 Dirty Words, more problems at the drive-thu and the passing of Kurt, may he finally rest in peace.
Digg [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #112: Your Wings Are Ready (explicit)Download #112: Your Wings Are Ready (EXPLICIT)
EXPLICIT CONTENT THIS TIME, KIDS.
We talk about Elvis Girl, Varsity Girl and the fact that I am not, nor will I ever be, Adam Ant.
The song from this episdoe is C*** In My Pocket by Iggy and the Stooges. Click the song title to download, thanks to [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #111: Two Hours, Im SorryDownload #111: Two Hours, I'm Sorry
Hudson and the new Beary
Two hours sleep. I don’t remember what was said.
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Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #110: Lets Get LostDownload #110: Let's Get Lost
I don’t remember what I talked about, all I remember is that I got lost. Well, not lost, but turned around.
Echo Park, Albert taking me to Los Vegas, Steal Plate in the Head Guy, Iraj, burning down the cottage, B-Movie books and firing puppets.
I’ll warn you, this is a car [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #109: The Dan Klass LifeStyleDownload #109: The Dan Klass Lifestyle
It’s not a diet, it’s a way of life!
So far, the first steps of the Dan Klass Weight Control Lifestyle:
1) Stomach and Mind Training: Don’t Eat Until You Feel Sick
2) Drink Tea. It’s made of leaves, not chemicals.
So, why don’t you know what I do? And if your [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #108: Low Blood Sugar MolestersDownload #108: Low Blood Sugar Molesters
Wow, do I need to eat. Now that I’m trying to cut back on the calories, I’m making myself nuts from lack of food. Ah, the joys of low blood sugar…
We’re back from NY, with lots to go over, including my yelling wife, Crazy Jack and Dune Boy, [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #107: I am (completely pointless), Therefore I EatDownload #107: I am (completely pointless), Therefore I Eat
A completely pointless half hour.
I ramble and eat this time, getting ready for our trip “East.”
I do talk a bit about “mongers” and “hummers,” though. Sounds more dirty than it is.
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Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #106: Hudsons Back!Download #106: Hudson's Back
My favorite co-host is back and better than ever. Hudson and I talk about Animal Rescue Force Friends, Myth Busters, Harry Potter, playing catch and trying to impress your son on The Radio Adventures of Doctor Floyd.
Join the ARFF! Mailing List! Click here!
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Share This [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #105: We are all FairportDownload 105: We are all Fairport
Twenty-five years ago, I graduated from Fairport High School in Fairport, NY.
On June 26th of this year, a mere five days after graduating themselves, five young women died in a head on collision with a tractor trailer while traveling to a family cottage.
Hannah Congdon, Bailey Goodman, Meredith McClure, Sara Monnat, [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #104: Another Apocryphal ShowDownload #104: Another Apocryphal Show
I read a little “fan mail” from a former listener. She got it right, I do have my head firmly implanted into my rectum. Need further proof, listen to the tale of Cool Chick’s sleep over. I need a vacation.
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Share This Episode! Click [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #103: Seven Foot Tall Cardboard Cut-OutDownload #103: Seven Foot Tall Carboard Cut-OutThis time I talk about whether or not your husband knows the councilman, and taking Hudson to the bank to look for terrorists. Well, something like that…
I guess I didn’t impress the judges at the TalentQuest. Can’t wait to see who made their Top 9.
Digg ItPowered by [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #102: Massive Murder
I finally tell the story of July 1st, 1993.
I also nearly ran over an Oscar winner.
click here to download/listenListen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #101: EchoI'm finally back on the mic, talking about echos, auditions and echos. Echo sucking materials (ridig fiberglas), sealing tubes of goo, going to the accountant, going "radio," Hudson's first audition...Write me with suggestions for The Bitterest Pill Volume 2 and the Public Radio Talent Quest.Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #100: Next Time, I'll Do BeterYes, (finally) it's show #100! I talk about BMW (me like), Maui (me like), Stumble Upon (me like), Twitter (huh?) and unplugging every once in a while...
Also, a couple sick child stories.
I want to be your Oprah. Let's get our crap together...together. Do you want to join The Bitterest Pill Book Club?
Coming soon: Dan 2.0
Thanks to Keith and Chemda of Keith and the Girl, Andy Bilodeau of AndyCast, Rodrigo of Mexico, and Marc my psycho stalker.
Scott Sigler's Ancestor makes it to the #8 ... Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #100: Next Time, I'll Do BeterYes, (finally) it's show #100! I talk about BMW (me like), Maui (me like), Stumble Upon (me like), Twitter (huh?) and unplugging every once in a while...Also, a couple sick child stories.I want to be your Oprah. Let's get our crap together...together. Do you want to join The Bitterest Pill Book Club?Coming soon: Dan 2.0Thanks to Keith and Chemda of Keith and the Girl, Andy Bilodeau of AndyCast, Rodrigo of Mexico, and Marc my psycho stalker.Scott Sigler's Ancestor makes it to the #8 spot ... Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #99: Get Something Going For YourselfI almost got a job with a great new start-up. Almost. Oh, well. At least the show won't suffer...My new phone is a Motorola SLVR. I thinkI like it a lot. At least, I like that the wall paper and the ring tone are all from "The Pill."I strongly suggest "profiling" the other people in line at the grocery store (and do a better job than I do)...Call 206-309-PILL (7455) to leave me a "Happy 100" message. Or, not. Actually, if you don't call, it's less work for me...Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Extra Story: Heather Armstrong
I had the honor of being the “featured performer” on the recent Story Salon podcast. I tell the story of Heather Armstrong, my first girlfriend. I think the first line is, “When I was ten years old, I was fairly certain I’d lost my virginity.” Something like that…
A bunch of great stories [...]Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #98: MindbenderThis podcast includes discussions of illegal drug use.I discuss my love of Target, the new studio in the garage, painting the house, "fart fans," and Cousin Ronny and the "Mindbender."Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #97: Uncle Charlie's
Ronny and I ask a waiter where to go to "dance and have fun," and he sends us Downtown.
We have a new house cleaner who wants us to keep the place clean.
Messages from Mesaj and Jason of The Half Show and the girl who thinks I menstrate...Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | #96: Snot KillsI have been sick and I have nearly gone insane. What a week...It is an honor to be the cover boy of the one year anniversary issue of Podcast User Magazine and to be their very first cover boy to boot.Here's to many more, PUM. Keep up the great work!Available nowListen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | |