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Sexgeeks: Transgenderism, sex-related podcasts, and listener mail

Sexgeeks: Transgenderism, sex-related podcasts, and listener mail

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DATE : Wed, 13 Apr 2005 10:32:00 -0500
Entered in Database : 2005-04-13 11:32:00
length : 37411821
Link to the Show / Show Notes

I'm posting thenewest SexGeeks installment(~37MB, ~1h 20m) without all of the supporting links et al because it's been a while since the last show and I'm not yet sure when I'll have gone through and found all of the links we mentioned and didn't want to delay the show any longer.So, I'll update this post with notes as I complete them, meanwhile I hope you enjoy the show!(PS, we're about to get on a regular schedule for making these shows so you'll better know when to expect them.)Notes as they get updated:Rob mentions the radio showGender Talkwhich focuses on transgender-related issues. Gender Talk has recently become available in podcast form (the podcast feed is in the upper right corner of the home page).We discussed arecent installment of Tech Nation(available in podcast form from the wonderfulIT Conversationssite, were Deborah Rudacille talks about the complexity of gender.Lindsay mentioned Koan Bremner'sCrossOverpodcast, where Koan has occasional audio snippets about her experience being transgendered.We opened a new delicious accout where anyone who listens can add links for everyone else to see. The user name is: imasexgeek. You'll have to listen to the show to get the password ;)We had a wandering discussion of other sex-related (from gender to kink) podcasts. Here are the ones we had actually listened to:Graydancer'sRope Weekly(watch for our next podcast which will have an interview with Graydancer in it)Cunning Minx'sPoly Weekly- Polyamory-oriented contentRob get's diverted briefly and mentions a bit of news that's been circling the Internet about how abstinence programs appear to generate the same occurance of STDs in the programs' participants as non-abstinence programs. One article mentioning this can be foundhere.More podcasts:Violet Blue'sOpen Source Sex- Primarily readings oferotica so farRebelDad'sSexTalk- Gender Issues/AdvocacyTopBit'sFetish Radio- Bi and BDSM plus music!While we were talking about podcasts we were browsing thesexandgendercatagories ofipodder.org.Here's the blog post from listener Hampton that we were talking about so you don't have to go find it (we're convenience oriented around here):I'm a young gay male in a semi-open relationship with the intent to marry (at first opportunity).Anyhow, I was a bit taken back by the comments about swingers. I don't label our relationship as "swinging"... more "open". I often argue with myself about labeling, because I use the term "semi-open"...To explain, we have yet to have sex apart from each other, but haven't barred it. We do have a threeway about once a season. We barely ever party or go out drinking. But we're mostly homebodies and completely in love. I'm often at a loss to really define us. Some in an open relationship fuck around daily. Some do it yearly. Some do it together, apart, etc.I just didn't like the way that couples that play were portrayed. I don't really feel that you guys have personal feelings on it, but it was just not talked about a lot.Personally, poly-amoury is something I'm not sure about. I like to be the only one in love with my fiancee. I'd be far more jealous of a date than a fuck.That being said, I often wonder about the positive affect that romantic affairs (secret) have on straight marriages.I don't know. I'm completely rambling. I spend an awful lot of time considering the philosophy and the social influences on how we see sex and love. I want to find the truth behind it, because I have a feeling a lot of social ideas force into our ideas of love and relationships.I think this should be an entire show. I wish I lived in Portland.... wherever.... I'd so be on the show to talk about this. I swear I'm more logical when I'm speaking.What about me recording an essay on my experiences with this, etc?Here's the email we got from an engineer listener about Lindsay's call for a good cunnilingus toy:Back on the February 13th 'cast, Lindsay asked specifically for agadget that simulates cunnilingus. It came up again March 22nd in thediscussion of machines, but I didn't hear that you had found anything.The only thing remotely like an oral stimulator I've ever seen are the"tongues" like these:http://www.mypleasure.com/store/product.asp?dept_id=804&pf_id=0948 (Lily)http://www.mypleasure.com/store/product.asp?dept_id=802&pf_id=0935 (mini-tongue)which are essentially indistinguishable from vibrators. I don't havethe impression that either of these devices is remotely like theexperience of a partner, even to the extent that some of the machinesare remotely like a partner using a penis.I started thinking about this problem from an engineering standpoint(hey, that's what I do for a living, though I mostly build softwaresystems that run hardware) and I was struck by how constrainedexisting machines are.The machines at the website you mentioned are, mechanically, 1-Ddevices, though the chairs move somewhat in 2-D. Using a good partneris at least 2D with significant force-feedback, though an inept orpassive partner, particularly woman-on-top positions, can beeffectively 1-D with off-axis pressure controlled by the receiver.My experience with cunnilingus (necessarily as the stimulator ratherthan the receiver) is that it requires 3-D motion, is adaptive bothwith regard to force and "cycle" speed, and relies on cues thatinvolve the recipient giving aural and manual feedback. I know I alsoswitch from a generally linear to more circular motion at varioustimes.As a purely mechanical problem, this seems intractable. The desiredforce and motion on the target, and even the location of the target,varies over time and may not be detectable at the target site.(Effective aural cues are nearly impossible; manual control probablyworks for force, but not for motion control.) Particularly as theonset of orgasm approaches, both force and the 3-D motion need tochange but quickly stabilize. (In some cases suction is also applied,though reflecting on it, this is not always true.)This seems the kind of problem that is complex, but at leasttractable, for a 4 or 6 degree of freedom robotic system with acombination of force-feedback, perhaps a remote sensor system, and asimple-to-operate (because you're distracted) user interface.Of course, with a computer interface the control system can bearbitrarily complex, and the techniques for controlling a motion baseare very well understood. (This makes me look at the Disney "StarTours" ride in a while new way, but it's the same problem.) Since I'ma nerd, I'm of course thinking in terms of general purpose hardware onwhich I can layer different software control laws and feedbacksystems. A really good predictive orgasm sensor would be helpful.But since I'm an engineer, I'm also interested in existing bestpractices and reusable components. So, did you get any pointers fromother listeners?Here's the artilediscussing scent and attraction in greater depth and that mentions a possible relation between birth control pills and attraction.While we were talking about female circumcision, Lindsay mentioned the extensiveWikipedia entry on the subject.Mark Savage'ssilicone-enhanced member was mentioned again.We again sing the praises ofscarleteen.com.Finally, Rob mentions the fascinating and wonderfulMcGraw-Hill Human Sexuality Image Bank.

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